His to Take

Jamie People always tell you to be yourself, but that's a luxury I can't afford. Not when my desires feel wrong. Not when they're something to be hidden and tamed, and definitely not acted upon. When my boyfriend breaks up with me, it feels like a confirmation of everything I've feared. It also leaves me scrambling for a new start-and a new roommate. Moving in with Tyler seems like the perfect solution, but it's not. Not when living together has started to awaken needs that I've spent years supressing. Which is a problem, because nothing good can ever come of falling for a straight man. Or can it? It turns out I'm not the only one with hang ups and suppressed needs. Tyler's shame mirrors my own in a way that makes me feel seen. Understood. Wanted. Wanted by him. I know this can't last, but for now I'm his to take. Tyler I have long since given up on having a real relationship. I've tried, but what I have to offer is not enough. Or rather, it's too much. Why would anyone sign up for that? I thought I was doing just fine-finding temporary comfort and release in people I knew would never stay. It's easier that way. Safer. Then Jamie moves in with me and redefines everything. Bit by bit, the protectiveness I feel towards him starts to shift into something sharper, more solid. And before I know it, I'm thinking of him as mine. Would he stay if he knew about the parts of me I feel so ashamed of? Or would he grow tired of me like everyone else? I don't know how long what we have will last, but for now he's mine to take.